The day every girl dreams of. It would be perfect in every way... and it was. But my guardian angel must have been crying... because the next day began the nightmare my life was to become... On our second night together, my exhusband and I got in an argument and he spent the night at his mother's. I thought about leaving him then... but decided that I was being unreasonable in my request to begin our honeymoon rather than drink with his best man. It meant a lot to him to share this with his friend. So, believing that the vows we'd taken meant something, I went back to him the next morning. The next ten years of my life were spent trying to keep him sane... no easy task as he was an alcoholic and was filled with a rage I would come to know very well. He was violent and verbally abusive. And he eventually destroyed every ounce of feeling I had for him. But I stayed... because after years of being told I couldn't make it on my own I believed him. I was afraid of him, but I was more afraid to be without him. I allowed my self-esteem to vanish because I didn't want to face a life all alone. I tell you about this, not to complain, but in the hope that someone out there might recognize yourself in my words, and doing so... will decide to love yourself FIRST. It's not being selfish...it's about being a whole person. We can't truly love anyone else until we learn to love ourselves. So, please...don't be an enabler don't give anyone the power to make you feel less than the wonderful person you are. And if, God forbid, you see yourself in the role of abuser please, get some help... there is no shame in seeking help for a problem only in NOT seeking it. 
* A woman is beaten every 15 seconds. * Domestic violence is the leading cause of injury to women between ages 15 and 44 in the United States - more than car accidents, muggings, and rapes combined. * Battered women are more likely to suffer miscarriages and to give birth to babies with low birth weights. * Sixty-three percent of the young men between the ages of 11 and 20 who are serving time for homicide have killed their mother's abuser. * Battering is the establishment of control and fear in a relationship through violence and other forms of abuse. The batterer uses acts of violence and a series of behaviors, including intimidation, threats, psychological abuse, isolation, etc. to coerce and to control the other person. The violence may not happen often, but it remains as a hidden (and constant) terrorizing factor. * One in five women victimized by their spouses or ex-spouses report they had been victimized over and over again by the same person. * Women of all cultures, races, occupations, income levels, and ages are battered - by husbands, boyfriends, lovers and partners. * Battered women are often severely injured - 22 to 35 percent of women who visit medical emergency rooms are there for injuries related to ongoing partner abuse. * Nationally, 50 percent of all homeless women and children are on the streets because of violence in the home. * From 1983 to 1991, the number of domestic violence reports received increased by almost 117%.
These statistics are obsene! AND IT HAS TO STOP!!
visit www.famvi.com If you are being abused, and need help, call: National Domestic Violence Hotline at: 1-800-799-SAFE(7233) Please don't use the graphics on this page... but you can load others by clicking on the logo.  Have you signed my guestbook yet? Please do...
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